My New Normal

By Tracy M. Houchins
October 4, 2016

Without warning, profound sorrow continues to swoop in. But it doesn’t grab me by the ankles, holding me under while I try to find my breath like it used to. On June 5, 2016 I was given devastating news. My only child ~ my beloved Chelsi ~ was found the day before on Springer Mountain in Georgia. Four months ago today she chose to leave her body and her physical life, freeing herself of her human suffering. At the foot of the Appalachian Trail, she took her last breath. Until very recently, I had been trying to catch my own breath. I am painfully aware that I have more healing to move through – it’s going to take some time – but I feel I have turned a corner and headed in the direction for what I have been seeking ~ my new normal.

Until this week I have felt Chelsi’s death is the worst thing that could have ever happened. Then it struck me. The truth is, the worst thing that could have ever happened would be that this quirky, cool, brilliant, creative, humorous, empathic, caring, loving, beautiful young woman lived and died for nothing. That would be the worst thing ever. But she didn’t. On the surface it appeared that Chelsi preferred to live in chaos, creating pain and suffering for herself, and that was that. But as I have learned from many people who have shared their story with me since her death, Chelsi gravitated to people during the most troubled time in their lives. Offering encouraging words and visions of hope for them, she helped them see their beauty and acknowledge their greatness. An advocate for those suffering themselves, she helped them see their lives from a higher perspective. Chelsi was walking the talk. She lived the life of a certain kind of Earth Angel. This realization opened something within me. It’s as if I am now seeing everything with a fresh pair of eyes. Before this new awareness I felt as if I was merely existing in the wake of disaster from the loss following my daughter’s suicide. The necessary path of grieving that I have been called to walk is not my own. I walk it with everyone who has or will grieve the loss of a loved one. This is a sacred experience and there is much to be learned so we can heal and grow spiritually.

It is not my intention to use this space to dwell on the past, but to utilize it to share life experiences with heartfelt authenticity as I move through and heal the profound sorrow on a quest to find my new normal. It’s my intention that what is shared here offers hope for those going through any life challenge.

It’s not our job to be strong all the time. I can’t heal when I’m holding my breath. Breath is the salve that will bring about the healing. I once heard Carolyn Myss, Medical Intuitive and Mystic say, “If we were meant to get through the big stuff in our lives by ourselves, wouldn’t we be through them already?” Breathe deeply with me and we will learn and heal and grow together.

With so much love,


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Obama told NBC News on Tuesday in an interview ahead of his farewell address that he hadn’t seen the news reports and wouldn’t comment on classified information. needed to continue strengthening its cyber defenses.

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Members of Trump’s camp issued their own denials separately from Trump.

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The timing of the appearance of the dossier is significant following a Senate Intelligence Committee hearing Tuesday about Russia’s campaign to disrupt the 2016 presidential election and ahead of Trump’s planned news conference. Democrats on Tuesday urged the FBI to reveal whether it is conducting any investigation into the Trump camp’s connections to Russia, but Comey rebuffed them.

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Trump’s former campaign manager, Paul Manafort, was forced to resign after information became public about his ties to pro Kremlin leaders in Ukraine, which Putin invaded in 2014. Russian Foreign Ministry officials boasted in the press about their contacts with Trump’s camp.

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and I received an email from the Provincetown Chamber of

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THE BLOGProvincetown Not Safe for Black LesbiansAt the tip of Cape Cod is the LGBTQ friendly haven, Provincetown, fondly called P goose outlet canada town, and known as the best LGBTQ summer resort on the East Coast. But this doesn mean there is no sexual and homophobic harassment.

By Irene Monroe, canada goose coats uk Contributor

This post was published on the now closed HuffPost Contributor platform. Contributors control their own work and posted freely to our site. If you need to flag this entry as abusive, send us an email.

Canada Goose Parka At the tip of Cape Cod is the LGBTQ friendly haven, Provincetown, fondly called P town, and known as the best LGBTQ summer canada goose outlet store new york resort on the East Coast. Canada Goose Parka

Of late, more lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer (LGBTQ) people of color (POC) have not only begun vacationing in P town, but we have also begun holding POC events.

For the past several years now, the “Women of Color Weekend” brings hundreds of us LBT sisters of color to P town from all across the country.

And it is the one time of the year many of us make the journey to P town, anticipating that we will feel safe enough, for a few canada goose clothing uk days, to let down our guard.

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Canada Goose Coats On Sale “A few years back I sent a letter about this very subject. and I received an email from the Provincetown Chamber of Commerce, instructing me to get in touch with them and the police if this happens again. well, it has happened again and again,” Ife Franklin of Roxbury, MA wrote me. Canada Goose Coats On Sale

canada goose Franklin and her wife were at “Women of Color Weekend 2011,” and she and several sisters of color were continually harassed. canada goose

canada goose factory sale “Now I will take ownership. So, if I call and say ‘there are some Black men harassing me’ will they round up ALL of the Black men? Even the ones that have done nothing wrong?” canada goose factory sale

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canada goose uk shop In the now defunct Boston LGBTQ newspaper In Newsweekly Will Coons in 2007 expressed in his “Letter to the Editor” his distress with the harassment. “I’m well aware of the white man’s burden and the need to be open and sensitive to historical injustices, but the flip side works as well: are these Jamaican men sensitive to, aware of, and respectful of the gay men who vacation here? My impression over the past ten years is that most of them are not and I distinctly feel uncomfortable in their presence.” canada goose uk shop

The lack of reporting about these types of harassment and assaults from LGBTQ people of color is canada goose outlet new york for two reasons both dealing with race.

The first reason is the “politics of silence” in LGBTQ communities of color to openly report these kinds of attacks unless it results in death. With being openly queer and often estranged if not alienated from our communities of color, reporting attacks against us by other people of color can make victims viewed as “race traitors.” And because of the “politics of silence” that run rampantly in our LGBTQ communities of color, we end up colluding in the violence against us.

The second reason has a lot to do with law enforcers, newspaper reporters, and doctors who view the topic of violence and people of color as synonymous.

Franklin wrote, “As my friends were waking back to the car Saturday night a car of 4 men slowed down and started hissing and asked my friend to come over to the car. She replied in canada goose jacket outlet uk a strong voice ‘I’m GAY,’ let it rest!!!I feel that this harassment is a time bomb about to explode.

Canada Goose Outlet On the morning of May 11, 2003, Shakia Gun, 15, was stabbed to death when she and her girlfriends rebuffed the sexual overtures of two African American men by disclosing to them that their disinterest was simply because they were all lesbians. Canada Goose Outlet

Incensed that they had been cheap canada goose rebuffed and by lesbians no less the two assailants reportedly jumped out of their car and got into a scuffle with the girls.

Stabbed by one of canada goose outlet store toronto the men, Gun dropped to the ground and died shortly after arriving at canada goose outlet online store University Hospital in Newark.

A groundbreaking study released in July 2010 titled “Black Lesbians Matter” examined the unique experiences, perspectives, and priorities of the Black LBT community.

uk canada goose This report reveals that LBT women of African descent are among the most vulnerable in our society and need advocacy in the areas of financial security, healthcare, access to education, marriage equality, and physical safety. uk canada goose

In using cheap and oftentimes exploited laborers, the shops that line P town’s main drag, Commercial Street, care little, if at all, about their workers’ cultural competency or our safety.

I have to agree with Coons when he wrote on 2007, “I can’t tell any local businesses how to run their operations. I can express my concerns, and I haven’t seen or heard of any overwhelming efforts to mitigate Jamaican male distain, distrust and disgust towards gays and lesbians.”.

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